Things not to tell bar tenders

Working as a bar tender you hear a lot of stuff. People tell you things that are so personal and really should be left to a therapist or man of the cloth.

This week I had a preacher tell me he was struggling with his marriage. "I love her, but. Well I have a real issue with her weight." Seriously? How can a man of God have an issue with the way his wife of 25 years looks and not be able to resolve his feelings? And why are you telling a stranger IN A BAR this information? I am so shocked by this.

I also had a 30 year old woman who was in the process of a divorce. She wanted my advice on how to handle the divorce process. She abandoned her husband and children and is ticked off that the courts awarded custody to the Dad. Really? And here you are in a bar when you are supposed to be meeting up with your daughter to develop a friendship. Then she tells me she ditched her 15 year old daughter for a day and met up with a guy she met on Craig's list to go for a motorcycle ride. Eye-yay-ya!

Then there was a couple who sat out at the pool bar all day sipping Rum Runners. They were all smiley and giggly when they left. Later, he was in the main bar alone. He and his gal had a spat. He's telling me how they were trying to have an intimate moment, when her kids interrupted them. The girlfriend/fiance gets all ticked off and takes the kids out for supper. He's in the bar hoping he's still engaged. He wasn't for long. Heard the next day that the girlfriend came in and gave him the ring back.

Then there is the 60 year old hillbilly who is in town "slutting around" and would I be interested in joining him at the hot rod car show. Maybe not.

Or the married man who I have been serving beers to for 5 years now, who tells you about an affair he had last night, while his wife was taking the kids back home.

I'm telling you, a bar is like a confessional. Unfortunately, I am not a priest and cannot absolve you of your sins. But let me pour you a beer and smile and pretend I really care.

Bottoms up!